I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
These tits shall not be calmed
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