so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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