I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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