have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
