if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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