Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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