Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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