I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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