i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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