why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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