I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
