Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
