Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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