Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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