I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
