I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
