I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
