I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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