i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Randomize
