We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
