Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
