are you still at the devil's house?
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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