I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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