So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
