i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
