I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I have post one night stand depression
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