i think my mom watched the whole time
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Boobs are out for the taking
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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