But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
