remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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