awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
