She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
