I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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