Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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