So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
