mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
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