He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
