Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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