I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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