Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize