He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
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