I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
