swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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