Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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