I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
