So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
