I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
