can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
