We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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