I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Let's paint friendship bongs
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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