Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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